reality bites.

maybe it was a spur of a moment... something that i just suddenly wanted to do without encouragement or reason to. i didn't even have time to think rationally about the action i was about to take. there i was thinking with a giggle:"gah~ lets just get this over with!"

by the term "get it over with" , i meant that i wanted the truth. i feel so tired with all these nagging thoughts...

1. is it okay that i go out with this guy if i still like another?
2. does it count as tricking the guy on this date?
3. i think i am fooling the poor chap... *feels guilty*
4. will he hate me if he found out i like another?

then there are those heart wrenching stuff they say...

1. i like you alot...
2. will you be my gurlfren?
3. gimme a chance?
4. i'd never hurt you wor...


concluding that i might actually relieve myself of such a lip-gnawing problem by simply telling him the truth. i take the sole blame for all this stupidity. haha!

so that i did just that, i meant- me confessing! it wasnt reli confessing tho...it was more like.. me giving rather obvious hints and clues. no point beating around the bush much. thank goodness he finally understood... yep, feel quite awkward.... abit sad, regretful but i'm glad its out.

i got wad i wanted. i just wanted the truth. i'm glad i found out sooner.. than later. i'm OFFICIALLY freeeeee~! guilt free to go out with others... cuz apparently according to him, now is not the right time and he likes another few gurls. i'm not goin bonkers but... i'm glad i have the truth and a reason now. i'm just wondering why didnt i just do this sooner?!

liars. rejected

so falling in love was the easy part. yeah... that was a no-brainer. now... how do u get outta LOVE?


i'm pretty sure i'm not in love. no, i am not in denial. chill~ i'm just in the late-teenage-pre-adult playful phase. hehe! just interested in having serious fun and getting involved in real-life drama. maybe right now is not the time for a steady relationship. maybe right now, is the time to explore and realise my girly dreams plus naughty fantasies...

it was on merdeka day that i made this breakthrough... im gonna live life to the fullest. doesnt it sound so corny? like its right out from the movies?

there i was, spending quality time with my family up in Kundasang, the foothills of Mount Kinabalu. it was a cold night... but not to the point of freezing tho. i received an sms from him---> X ,saying that he was caught up in a bar fight, is hurting and feels like he's dead. being myself, i went into panic mode and got worried... but a tiny voice inside of me told me to call another good fren,Wil to find out if X was orite. i called and heard the fella's voice in the background while talking to Wil. he sounds orite to me... the next day, i drove down from my holiday villa and met up for weekly badminton. aside from bruised knuckles and a nearly-unnoticeable swollen cheek, he looked and seemed A-OK.

so... enough said! i refuse to believe i over-reacted cuz Yvon reacted the exact same way i did. i hate liars!.... or braggers!... or..or guys who make a mountain out of a mole hill! HMMPH!